Inspired

I am inspired to live each day to the fullest!
To greet the morning air with deep and grateful breath
To make the most of each precious step I take--grounding me and further connecting me to our Mama, Earth
To be slow
To observe
To see my children with clarity and truth
I am inspired!
I am inspired to live Joyfully
To interact Lovingly
To connect Meaningfully
To be grounded, still and wakeful
I am inspired
Inspired to give my children and myself due honor
To shape our lives around presence, awareness, love and respect
To connect with the Nature that is All around us
I am Inspired
To greet the Magic
_________of each day
_____________with
_________Arms___Wide___Open!

And so we move along, and say goodbye to the comfort and familiarity of nursing.

I am back.
And today I am here only to speak of one thing. A very monumental thing on this very important day to my daughter and I. . .

Alas it has come. Yesterday morning Tyler nursed, and it was the last nurse my sweet baby child will get from these adored breasts of mine. It is all such beauty. Her growth, my love, her love, my growth. So much has been passed from my body to hers, energetically and through the nectar of the breast. So much love, so much comfort, so much care and just Ah, to explain it fully would be impossible. There is the sad part of me, but maybe it is just sentimental. This transition. From one phase to the next.
Thank you my sweet baby child for the beauty of being able to sustain you as I have, and for the future of being able to sustain you as I will.
I love you and you are truly blessed. I have so much love from you and I am truly blessed.
Such heart to you my darling one goes!!!
<3 <3 <3

Rhythm Equals Sanity! Thanks Given!!!

Before I blog today, I just want to mention something that relates to a previous blog post. I mentioned that I was giving T Bach's Rescue Remedy flower infusion when she took her bedtime bath. Those two days I did so were perfectly fitting, as they were stressful days. However, now that stress is not the norm, I realize that it is a medicine to use only on days where stress is occurring. So if it's been a rough day, the Rescue Remedy is safe and gentle. I think it's a wonder aid!

And now, on to the rest of today's blog post:



Our lives have established the rhythm and flow that I have been in great need of!!! Hooray!!!

The constants(with obvious variations, depending upon circumstance) have comfortably settled into something like this:

Wake up, Nurse
Make Mom's bed/roll up T's bedroll
Breakfast
Go on an Outing
Mid-morning snack(seems small, but is a vital key to maintaining the flow!! If it is missed, everything may collapse from that point of the day on!)
Home for Lunch
Quiet Time(we've worked up to an hour. Also, a note about quiet time, I feel that it is important to time this wisely, and to aim for the same time each day. The little ones need down time, and if pushed too far it can get stressful for Mama and child. Also, if you are trying to smoothly transition from nap to no nap like us, it is important to facilitate quite time before their bodies and minds become exhausted and need to sleep! It works beautifully and I highly recommend it!!!)
Go on an Outing/Play in the yard depending
Home for dinner prep and eating
Tea(we've just added this evening ritual in today. I am very excited about it!!)
Read books(I've also just begun this tonight because it worked well. I have felt for a while that reading books before bath time made more sense for T as once she's had her bath, all she wants is to nurse and sleep!)
Bath Time
Sleep(and this has grown a nightly ritual all it's own. It goes something like this: get diaper and jammies on, unroll & prepare bedroll[which is used folded up as a sitting area for T during the day--it is part of the intentional calm space in the room, and SO amazing! She literally screeched with jubilation while hitting it in excitement the first time I set it up for her!!!], put blanket up in window[still gotta get curtains up there], then lay down to nurse and sleep. It is so established, and I realized this because tonight I put the blanket in the window before unrolling the bed, and while I was doing this T was busy getting her teddy bear and pillows[used as cushions in the day] and blanket[laid out on the seat during the day] off of her bedroll. She then asked for assistance as she could not get it unrolled on her own[it is heavy, lots of wool blankets and a heavy woven cotton blanket are what makes up her bedroll]. That's when I clued into what she was up to. And out like a light was she once we lay down together! ^.^ And that's when I realized the amazing accomplishment that has at last naturally woven itself into our lives!)

Also, in the afternoon she sometimes requests a nurse, so that happens as well. I am really quite surprised how in these last few days, even her requests for milk have gone down, and not because of discouragement. I feel it's more of understanding/moving past it. For instance, she asks for me instead of milk, but in the same way she used to ask for milk, showing that she can satisfy her need to be close with me/have my attention without necessarily nursing.

So thrilled am I about this wonderful sense of routine, and the way it had to be, one that naturally worked itself into our lives, taking the lead for us to follow. It feels amazing! And I can definitely feel the impact of T knowing what to expect from her days! Such beauty in the simplest, yet most important, things in the life of a Mother and her child!

And now, for some tasty pictures from today!

Breakfast
Her breakfast was so beautiful, I was inspired to photograph our meals. This was, from the left, scrabbled eggs with Red Bell Peppers, Rhubarb/Strawberry/Sorrel sauce with a dollop of thick plain yogurt, and a small glass of Carrot juice(a gift from a friend).
The success of this meal for my toddler>: The sauce she mostly wanted the yogurt from and the occasional strawberry bit, but mostly it was played with more than eaten. The carrot juice ended up in the fridge in full. The eggs she devoured, plus a third of mine(not so much on the Red Peppers, though).
The success of this meal for me: I enjoyed it. The sauce received some Agave nectar, however. I think the rhubarb was just not so hot. The rest was delicious.

Lunch
This was the lunch spread. Our meals aren't always this beautifully presented, but I was rather inspired today, and I hope it will continue!
The self-serve portion is meant to be toppings/additions to the alphabet pasta, which I served for her with Miso gravy(Miso mixed with water to reach proper consistency). Oh, and it's Miso gravy in the mug, not coffee. :) The silver tray contains Cucumber and Avocado(from the discount shelf at the green grocer I shop at. I try not to buy things from far away, however I allow myself to get the nearly trashed things!), on the three-dished platter are heirloom Tomatoes, Red Bell Peppers and Mango(also a gift from my lovely, lovely friend!), and the other thing is the lid to the sprouts, which I used to serve some in. The whole thing ended up on her plate.

And here is her plate. Aside from the alphabet noodles and gravy, she served herself, and was quite delighted by the process. She's sporting the noodles, Cucumber, Avocado and sprouts(deli sprouts).
The success of this meal for my Toddler: She loved it and ate most of it...or all...I can't remember. Oh to be a Mom! Well, I took most of her sprouts thinking it was too much for her.
The success of this meal for me: Amazingly delicious!!

I also wanted so badly to share a photo of T having tea, however for some frustrating reason the computer won't allow me to open that one photograph for uploading to here. Perhaps I can add it tomorrow.

Yesterday my friend, who lives a 30 minute drive away, came with her lovely daughter who is a month older than T. It was so nice, and T has been talking about them so much since we've moved into our new home, and non-stop since talk began about them coming to visit. Can't wait to see them again. And yes, she is the delightful one who brought me Carrot juice and a Mango. :)

Tomorrow we are going to the Farmer's Market, hopefully biking, though it is a distance away. It's funnier, really, we're closer to the farms most likely. After this, we are starting a new biweekly date with Auntie J & Uncle J of introducing ourselves and each other to new meals, things we haven't made before. I am excited to add variety to my meal preparation. Also, we are going to focus on using local, seasonal food. This should be good. I am going to rotate this with our pool trips as the chlorine was too much to take every week. Soon it will be the Lake...if summer ever comes. Today was sunny, so there is hope!

Alright, it is getting on. Much love to you all.
Thank you so much for reading!
Please do leave me a comment!!
Love!
-Sarah Christina

New Camera! And Another Wonderful Day! :)

*EDIT* I mention in this blog post the effectiveness of Bach's Rescue Remedy to aid with settling down for sleep at night. I just want to express that during this time, stress was a common daily factor. Now that I am feeling better, I want to say that I think RR is ideal for those crazy and stressful days, but not just as a general bedtime routine.**

Today was good. It did not go the way yesterday went as I had hoped, however I see why, it makes sense, and it is totally okay.
A lot of what I believe worked so well with sleep patterns yesterday was that I intentionally set aside Quiet Time, both for T and myself. Surrounding this was thought and timing. I set this time aside after lunch, a time which has been a usual nap time(at last!). I explained that it was time for a quiet time, suggested what quiet things she could do, and stated that she was free to do what she wanted with this time, while the intention was to take some space and be calm. It worked wonderfully.
Today, we had a busy morning visiting a farm, a nursery and a grocery store. This morning easily became an afternoon as well, and we did not return home until about 1:15 pm. I pushed the little monkey too far, and she fell asleep not long before our bicycle rode up to our house.
I think that if I am going to use Quite Time as a down-time in place of naps, I need to be mindful of her needs timing wise for it to work. I need to be consistent and watch her cues.
The long and the short of it is that I feel it reasonable to expect a bit of a nap on Wednesdays(which I want to be our regular shopping day, which means a bicycle ride to the farm stand and then the green grocer down the road). On other days, however, I would like to mindfully incorporate the Quite Time as I did yesterday.
So I am excited!

Oh, and having mentioned the Nursery, we finally picked up some lovely plants for the house! Now to set T up for caring for them! Photos to come! ^.^

Today's Nurse Report:
In the early morning hours(she crawled into bed with me just after I went to bed last night) she nursed quite possibly every 20 mins towards the end of it, until finally awaking herself and me. That felt a bit tiring, esp. since there was nursing through the night. It was okay though.
She nursed back to sleep as she woke groggy when I placed her in bed from her bike seat.
She nursed to sleep.
It was manageable and good, though I could live without the hour early half-wake of nurse-nurse-nurse.

Bed time went alright, though later than I would like(for my own reasons of space and time to myself/my own decent bedtime). There is one lovely thing I've done for the past two nights now to encourage relaxation for my little one. During her bath I have given her a few drops of Bach's Rescue Remedy (homeopathic flower essence) on the tongue. I would recommend this for winding down at the end of stressful days. Tonight I also added Lavender essential oil(a favorite around here) and a dab of coconut oil(for lovely oiled skin, and heat retention during the night). I also would like to begin the ritual of post-dinner tea drinking. I found her an amazing little cast-iron tea pot which I am beside myself about! I am thinking Lavender, Chamomile and Lemon Balm. (We have Lemon Balm growing in the garden that we dug up and brought over from our last house and she LOVES it. She loves to visit it, to water it, to pick and eat it. She has often talked/asked about Lemon Balm water, so this will be a welcome drink, I think.)

And some exciting news!! My memory stick came in today and does in fact work!!
And so, with no further adieu, my photographs from today! (I will add more tomorrow. I would like to find out how to upload them without having to wait so long. I tried uploading 5 at once and none of them ended up working. Any suggestions??)

"I'm digging with a shovel, too, Mom."




Some of our lovely tomato flowers! (We bought started plants at the Farmer's Market).




Thyme Hands <3>

The amazing joy this dearest one feels!! Oh my Lord! <3>

In Love and Joy,
-Sarah

Breathe in the Refreshment!! What a wonderful day!

Today was nice. I am excited about a few things.

1. Today we worked at no nap, and it was no challenge. There was a bit of over-reacting towards pre/post dinner time, but nothing a bit of understanding and patience on my part didn't help. And Viola! It's 7:00 pm and my little one is down for the night, no fuss, no battle, not even the relaxing CD I used to finally get her down at 10:30 last night! We have been going back and forth between napping and not napping, and today finally felt like an ideal sleep patterned day!!

2. Nurse Land, loving it rather than being fed-up! The only time she nursed today, aside from nursing to sleep, was when she received a minor bloody nose from some uncoordinated dance moves with the other sweet ones at Music Together this morning. that was about 10:30am. She didn't even seem to notice not having a wake up nurse. She asked a couple times during the day for a nurse, but I diverted it. At the end of the day, nursing her to sleep, I felt really good about it! I want it to be like this. I want to be able to nurse with her at the end of our busy days. I want to be able to have milk for her when she really needs comfort and grounding, or in case she should become ill. And this level of nursing, this level I can absolutely live with! Let's see how it goes from here. :)

3. I have discovered an amazing resource offered by BC Housing here in BC. It is a Rental Assistance Program. In short, once I begin working and am no longer on assistance, I can receive an amount of money to go towards my rent. This has given me hope and enthusiasm about becoming financially independent! Go Mama, go! (This is especially exciting to me because it makes my desire to have my own place with T more achievable.)

4. I am, after being motivated better by blogs I've read, planning on going back to cloth diapers. I honestly don't know why I stopped. I think my issue was the kind of diapers I was using as opposed to the fact that they were cloth. Anyways, a while back I bought 5 nice cloth diapers in the hopes of returning to cloth land. I have learned that 10 might be a more reasonable number to keep in stock. So, I am planning to either purchase or sew some ASAP. Weeeee!! (I also did not think T would still be in diapers after 2, but hey, it's her thing.)

5. We had a glorious day today, the little monkey and I! After breakfast, we walked with T in the stroller to our beloved Music Together class(about a 5 minute walk for grown-up legs). We had so much fun there, as usual. Then, we came back with T walking and leading the way/pace. It was so wonderful. I have been wanting to make it a priority to give space for her to experience a walk where she takes the lead and has the time, space and opportunity to walk as slowly as she wants, to stop and experience anything she sees along the way she wishes to. It was incredibly rewarding. I feel that this start played an immense role in creating the day we experienced! (She chose to take her boots and socks off part way too, which was lovely for the grassy parts!)
After lunch, I created intentional space for "quite time" for both T and myself. I think that the fact that this time I was also having quite time (journaling in the living room right outside of our bedroom) effected her ability and motivation to also enjoy her quiet time. She was busy dressing the lovely and anatomically correct baby boy doll our good friend Auntie J lent to her, and tending to her other babysitting duties. During this time I played a lullaby type CD with some nice singing and classical style music. I truly believe that this is an incredibly important time for her, to have this facilitated down time, especially if she is not napping.
After this, we had a lovely bike ride. The intention of this was to pick of the memory stick for my new digital camera, however it was faulty. They are going to order me a new one which will be in tomorrow, and so that may mark the beginning of my life as a text and picture blogger!! I am excited for that! :) Though the mission was not achieved, so much more magic and beauty occurred. She was super excited about the lovely fountain in the middle of the square where the store was. After some wet time spent being enchanted, and making a new little friend, we were off. I decided to take a different way back and see if we could find our way. Well, we also happened upon a park. Need I say more?
After returning home T had fun playing and snacking. Then dinner and a bath and to bed. And here I am, free to relax and finish off the rest of the Panda Licorice! ^.^

Much love to you all! I look forward to photo blogs soon!!!

-Sarah Christina, One Radical Mama! ^.^

The No-Nap/Late Nap & Irregular Bedtime Girl, and her Tired, Disorganized Mama

Ah, the striving for structure/routine/order in my life and in T's life has evolved into seemingly endless sleep struggle. She is not into any sort of structure with her sleep and it is driving me a bit mad. Both her naps and her bedtime are super irregular, which I know ultimately is fine. For her anyways. I do feel she could benefit from regularity in sleep-land though. Mostly I want to preserve my sanity. I mean, come on, over two years as a single bicycling/busing Mama? I am slightly tired and going a tad bit insane!! Tonight she told me she was ready to sleep, we went through the whole bed-prep business(though I confess my tiredness is resulting in a lacking of a solid routine, which is to say on tired nights, I skip the bath). After nursing and then laying and singing and back-rubbing, then listening to a relaxation/visualization CD for toddlers I found at the library, giving her a soother(which until late has been soley a teething pain reliever), putting a blanket in the window, leaving her on her own, sitting with her and rubbing her, reminding her to be calm, etc, etc, etc, she still came out of bed in the end.
Currently (9:00pm), Chris is out with her on a stroller "Sleep Walk", as I dubbed them when she was around 5 months and having trouble sleeping for a bit. I would put her on my body and nurse/walk her to sleep--Sleep Walks. Hopefully this will work tonight, though I have to say that more-so in the last few months, Sleep Walks as a last resort are not as effective as they once were and I often return or have returned to me a wide-awake or cranky milk-demanding toddler(which, I must say, I am also tiring of...*sigh*).

I pray that soon I will no longer have these issues eating away at my energy and such. The sleep thing is huge. I know it will be okay. I am grounded, I am strong. I will get through this and so will T, and I know it really isn't that bad.

Still, any advice is highly desired.

Thank you for reading!

-Sarah

GAAAAAAHHh!

I am feeling immensely aggravated right now. I realize that it is not T's fault, however what I am feeling is in relation to experiences with her.
She woke up really early, which felt even earlier than it should as I stayed up FAR later than I ever should(1:00am). However, we've managed to have a wonderful morning, we went to music together after a pancake breakfast(which did involve T whining at me to the point where I was yelling at her and putting her in her room, hoping she'd just take the time to have a break and relax, which semi-sorta worked. So, maybe not all wonderful).
After we returned from that, with a stop at the small playground on the short walk home, lunch was prepared and eaten. I called T in from outside to either eat some more lunch or come and lay down with me for a nap. She chose the second option, we washed her up and got her PJs on(at her request). After laying with her for a while and getting SO annoyed at the constant prodding and squirming and grabbing, and just sick of even her suckling, I pulled my boob out in hopes she would roll over and go to sleep(as she often does). However, she became perky and awake again and now it is all I can do to just be calm.
I am just sick of nursing, and sick of her not sleeping when it feels like it should be time to sleep. I want so badly to have some sort of order and routine in my life, and it is feeling more and more difficult the more I try.
Can someone please give me some wonderful advice!?

Thank you!
-Sarah Christina (hoping her mother will come soon!!)